3 Life Changes Men Must Embrace
My family stood there together for the last time in that form. Beside a rented car in a town 400 miles from home, the inevitability of life changing progress was at hand. How I’ve loved the 18 years that led here. I stood there seeking the right words as her eyes looked up at me waiting. “Make smart decisions. I’m so proud of you.” My exterior maintained the strength she needed, but my heart wanted to never release her from my protection. I had to let go. College and the future had arrived.
Do you find yourself resisting change that must occur for your life and family to grow? Change is certain, and as men, we have to be ready and adaptable enough to accept each new challenge. [Tweet This] The best way to shape positive change is to muster the courage to face reality. We knew well in advance my daughter would be leaving. Plans were made accordingly and we’ve set her up to be successful.
Here are 3 major life changes we must embrace to successfully keep moving forward.
1. We’re Getting Older
I recently turned 50. I’m not exactly ecstatic about that, but the date came regardless. Various ages bring different perks and challenges. I can now get discount hotel rates, but I also must consider sugar and salt as adversaries. I really like sugar and salt. My liking of them plays no role. In my marriage, we must begin transitioning to a coming empty nest. How will we coexist and thrive after children? Aging scares many men. They tend to cling to where they were and that can cause serious issues. Don’t be the guy stuck 10-20 years behind reality. Embrace your age and the season you are in and make the most of it.
2. Our Children Grow Up
This area has perhaps been my biggest stumbling block as a dad. I’ve enjoyed each stage so much I get depressed when they change. My youngest daughter, who is nearly 15, cannot stand that I still want her to be that 10-year-old that followed my every footstep. She needs me to accept the current her. I accomplish that by giving her increments of the independence she seeks as appropriate. This involves how she dresses, how I speak to her, the level of trust between us, and giving her space to test her own dreams without projecting mine upon her.
3. Marriages and Relationships Evolve
Irreconcilable Differences is the most often cited reason for divorce. “We just drifted apart,” have been the words spoken by millions of couples. Why did you drift apart? The answer to that is usually because change was not accepted. She’s not that same young woman you first met, and you’re not that same guy you were. If you want to avoid drifting apart, it starts by facing physical, emotional and philosophical changes together as one. For instance, my pastor married a vibrant, intelligent go-getter woman. Change then brought her great physical hardship and she’s now wheelchair bound long before her senior years. Her physical challenge is also his. She’s still as vibrant, intelligent and go-getting as ever. He still adores her as he did when he first fell in love. Circumstances changed but they evolved with them.
What are some of the big changes that have occurred in your life recently?