Unfortunately this was proven true in Northern Kentucky about ten years ago when my child and I went through it. False accusations from one parent were assumed true; even when admitted as lies (isn't this something like perjury or making a false statement under oath or inducing panic or SOMETHING?), that "parent" was still shown extreme favoritism. I as the other parent was neither apologized to nor allowed compensation for two years of lies only admitted after custody was taken away through one-sided attacks and one-sided judgments. My facts, presented through evidence and corroboration and eventual admission by my ex-wife, were summarily dismissed each time. Then the same judge determined it was best to leave all as-is. Ten years later, it's still "as-is." Thanks for allowing me to lift this post-holiday pain off my heart for a little while. Staying as involved as possible--despite custodial interference from the custodial parent--keeps our kids from looking for the very surrogate "fathers" that rapists and drug dealers pretend to be.

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What a great article. I see all these feelings. When any parent is separated I know that the child is left feeling abandoned. The loss of love that is shown in the marriage and then within the family is uncomprehensible. If there is one piece of advice I wish my father would have let me know Its that When I was born a true miracle happened. Every parent speaks about this but we sometimes seem to get lost in the stresses of perception. Then so many things just fall apart. Remind yourself , your sons and everyone you encounter of the true miracle they possess and I know this will work back around to everyones well-being.

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These statistics are alarming - and it is not getting any better. Father-absence caused by three critical factors: (1) divorce, (3) separation, and (3) births to un-wed parents continues to rise year after year. Here is a Fact Sheet on Father Absence with some more statistics that show how the trends have been increasing over the last several decades. These stats also show that the problem is not limited to any particular ethnic or religious group. Nor is it just here in the U.S. It is international in scope, encompassing all groups: Fact Sheet on Father Absence It is time to challenge (and encourage) "separated-fathers" to "step-to-the-plate" with their children. A separated-father who takes care of and nurtures his children (in spite of the difficulties) is truly an "All-Pro Dad"! Akili Kumasi Reconciled Fathers Network

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I am a teacher/coach, and see daily the results of a fatherless generation. Every year I have to walk out with one of my football players on Senior night as they do not have a parent or relative that shows up for the games. SAD! A suggestion I have for the fathers reading this.......be a positive role model for ONE of your children's friends. Take them to church. Show them HOW a father should act.

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True, the system is not fair. I do not want to vent on this site. but if I did half the stuff mom admitted too in court I would be sending this email from jail. the courts are blind! the problem is a lot of women use the system because they know it is not fair!

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Father's often up in a defensive role in a divorce. It is sometimes assumed the mother is the more important or main custodial role. Not true and hat's off to any Dad who stays involved as the key or at least equal parent. The courts need to recognize this and not penalize father's with unfair support orders when we share custody.

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I am living proof of the stats on this article. I was divorced back in 1994 and though very invovled with my son in sports and any activity that he liked, he still added that my involvment was not enough as he felt he did not have a full time parent. Since then he has been involved with the law and dependent on drugs.

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I would strongly encourage Mr. Jensen to continue to stay involved in his children's life, but also suggest that he help his children to find a mentor to look up to if he is not there all the time. My father left when I was one year old and never returned, I found myself looking for role models and mentors I could look up to. It also helped me become a better father for my own 3 childred later lin life. PS: Make sure the children know that you love them unconditionally.

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David, you have a point, but that doesn't solve the issue which is how do I get to have more of an influence in my children't life. Sometimes it requires sacrifice from you. What is the most important your child's life, or your financial status. Think about moving closer.

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Based on these statistics, you wouldn't think that the judicial system would award custody of a child to the mother automatically during a divorce. I have two children that don't live with me. Unfortunately I don't live near them so I only see them about 4 or 5 times per year. My oldest is 11 and is struggling in school, and it’s obvious that he would be better off with me than with his unemployed mother. Unfortunately cannot afford to begin a custody battle due to child support and other money spent trying to see them as much as possible, not to mention the normal cost of living these days. The solution for children from divorced homes living in a fatherless home, is to award the child to the most capable parent; not the mother by default unless she's a drug user.

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