My first anniversary was the day the you sent this...since the anniversary gift is paper. I thought I was being creative by buying her a ticket to Hawaii, I included your suggestions. She loved it, I am not sure if she evens cares about going to Hawaii.

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White Board markers work really well on bathroom mirrors. My wife and I worte a note to each other about a year ago. I'll be writing one tonight.....and tomnorrow......

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May God bless you to find that special person again. I wish couples would do more for each other. I know how you feel.

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MAY GOD BLESS YOU!!!!!........ AND TRUST SHE WILL KNOW WHAT YOU WROTE!!<3

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@ Brian with the shower crayons. What a great and EASY idea! Thanks dude!!!

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I had to smile when I read this. A few months back, my wife purchased some water erasable crayons for our children to play with when they were in the bath. Well, I had the thought to borrow one of those crayons to write my wife a note every morning when I am in the shower. The overall affect on our marriage has been stunning. The fire is coming back. We are in a less than perfect marriage, we do fight from time to time, I wish it was less often. Since I started writing these notes, which are sometimes Scripture, sometimes an apology, sometimes a steamy love note, things are getting better, not perfect, but better. I plan to keep it up! What is great is that my wife always writes me a note back. It is vitally important to appreciate each other daily, because with kids and trying to survive in this economy, things get crazy busy.

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On the same topic but a different delivery...I have found that a quick text message to my wife saying hello, hows your day, miss you, love you, thinking of you, etc. helps to feel connected. Text messages are more personal than you might think...give it a try.

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For the past over 35 years on Valentines Day, I hide those little valentines, the kids ones that come about 30 to a box, all over the house. I put them i summer coat pockets, under the mattress and other places that she wouldn't normally go to. I mark the year on them and she finds them throughout the rest of the year. This year she found one from two years ago. I also give her a regular valentine's card and of course some chocolates which we share!

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That is a good idea me and my wife are having problems know. I think i will start and hope that this will save my marriage.

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I love the idea of notes -- but especially loved the idea of the book of firsts. Kathy and I's first date was on April 19, 1980. (Yes, we've been blissfully married for almost 29 years) I'm going to get my wife a book of "firsts" put together to give her on that date.

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Great idea. Albeit, I now need to write two notes a day for 15 years to catch up :-)

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For some reason, this was something I learned a long time ago. I do not know if it was because I communicate better through writing what I want to say, but for 37 years now I have left so many notes and silly poems for my wife I can't begin to count them. I even went a little further and since she had kept every one of them in a shoe box, I had them bound in a book for her to keep last Valentine's Day. The Valentine's before that I made a picture book of all of our firsts and had them bound into a book for her: the place we went on our first date, a picture of the first place we lived, a picture of the first home we purchased, a picture of our first car, a picture of our first child, the church we were married, our first day of work, college, etc. There are so many things that are special for our wives. I started last month having flowerw delivered to her the 26th day of each month, representing the day of the month we were married. I send my daughters a special card once a month: my oldest daughter receives one on the first day of each month because she was born on August 1; my middle daughter receives her card on the sixth of each month because she was born on July 6 and my youngest daughter receives her card on the second of every month because of her March 2 birthday. I hope these thoughts and cards are as special to all of them as they are to me.

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Great article. I was married for almost 20 years prior to my divorce last year. For the better part of my marriage, I showed my wife all the tricks in the book how much I love her everyday of my life. But it does take two to make a marriage work. I think note writing works if you have a better half that cares so much as to take their time to read it. I my case , my ex was so consumed in trying to end our marriage I wrote her notes after notes but nothing works that I became exhausted in the end and just gave up pursuing the married life. God bless to those men who truly have a loving wife. A faithfull wife is like a treasure that is hard to find. But when you do find them, hold on to them at all cost.......

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I'm glad you brought this up. I use to do that early on in our relationship and got away after the kids came along. You are right about it not being about the length of the note. I'm starting back right away. I love my wife

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The above comments are so upbeat I felt a need to inject a comment for those who may not be feeling so affirming. It can be difficult for a man to embark on somesthing like this if he doesn't believe he's getting the appreciation/affection he needs. The "What's in it for me?" bug can infect any of us. Nevertheless, somebody needs to start the flow of positive comments, and it might as well be the man. If it's done expecting something in return, however, it probably won't work, and he'll be let down again.

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..that photo book idea struck a chord with me..great idea man..going to do that today and surprise her..awesome.

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I don't know where to start. We celebrated our 23rd anniversary apart (July 19) and when we got back home it was an awkward feeling, not sure why. my wife got a chance to visit sisters out of town and i sent a great email while she was away, now I don't have a clue on what to start leaving.

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Awesome suggestion...thanks for the wise counsel on this from everyone's comments as well as All-Pro Dad. I'm going to get started right away! It's so easy to become complacent in our marriages and we need to do things like this to keep the staleness away.

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Thanks for this little tip. I recently took a new job, and have been feeling that my marriage has been suffering physically. While I have expressed this to my wife, we haven't been struggling to find ways to express our love through words. I will try this as well and see if we can find new ideas.

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I have been writing a poem a day (sometimes more)to the love of my life for the past two years. She is my muse, so we call them 'Musings'. I know she loves receiving them, but to me the real gift is giving them. Having her love in my life is the greatest gift of all.

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Dear Ken: I read this article on writing notes to your wife, and it struck me that this could even help a person to heal even if their wife is no longer with them. This coming Wednesday is the first anniversary of my wife Rita's passing away from non-smoker's lung cancer at age 57, just one month after we had both retired and were on the verge of fulfilling our plans for our "golden years". It's going to be a difficult day for sure.... I was writing notes to her early on and continue to pray for her and to her, and I was truly blessed to share nearly 36 magical years of marriage with her. But now I think I might begin writing to her again, and sharing all that has taken place in my "new life" without her at my side. She was 18 when she accepted my proposal of marriage, and I'll be honest with you - not a day goes by when I don't miss her and don't cry.... Thanks for the reminder that it's never too late to tell your best friend how you feel. And I trust that she'll know what I wrote.... God Bless, John

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I have a different version to this. After our first child we went on a vacation, during the vacation I took pictures of her doing anything, sleeping, standing on one leg, looking over the balcony, running from a seagull. After we returned I took all of the pictures and wrote a short paragraph in the middle of a page about what I thought of the picture. The thought could be anything from how attractive she is in my eyes to how silly she was acting in a certain pose to something sexual to let her know the sexual attraction was still there, (very important after a child) and created a running joke or theme from one page to the next. After about 10 or 15 paragraphs, I took the pictures, taped them above the corresponding paragraph and copied and bound them at kinkos to created a book with a card stock cover. I left the book for her to find when she was feeling overwhelmed with the house and kids and it brightened up her week. After she read it, she went through it page by page with me to question me and why i wrote something and get new jokes from what I said. That was 8 years ago, to this day any time she thinks of the book it creates the same good warm feeling inside her with a smile that she can't hide.A little work but dividends eight years late, well worth it. I like the notes, i will use that one.

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TO PK: Thanks Brother....i think thats a wonderful idea....i will get on that right away!!

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Guys, this is a great way to show your appreciation for the wife you've been blessed with. An adaptation that I've done is to write an attribute for each letter of the alphabet and place them in the places that she frequents; inside her favorite book, on the pc, in her car, or around the house. She may not find them all in order, but the mystery of discovery is still there. She still has a few to discover after several weeks, but she's indicated that she's in no hurry for this to come to an end, and she enjoys the surprise and joy when one turns up. She's told me that when she does find one, she leaves it in place and writes the message down in her journal. She leaves it there to know that I value her and reminds her that I took a little time to appreciate her. So, grab your pen and post-it notes, and be a bit transparent. Your marriage will be better for it.

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