10 Creative Ways To Spend More Time With Your Wife

Many of us date, fall in love, get married, launch our careers, start a family… and then drift apart. Why? The reasons vary, but sometimes it’s all because we stop spending time with our wife – not often enough nor long enough to stay connected and madly in love.

It turns out that two of our best-known clichés: “Familiarity breeds contempt” and “Absence makes the heart grow fonder” are both completely false when it comes to marriage. Together time is a necessary ingredient if we value relationships that last.

However, and like anything else worthwhile, carving out time with your wife is going to require creativity and intention. All Pro Dad thinks your wife is worth the effort. We’ll give you a jump-start on the creativity – the intention you’ll have to provide for yourself.

1. Talk about it: A declared objective is the first step toward change. Talk about “together time” with your wife.  Let her know you want to increase time, then make your plans together.

2. Measure it: There’s a tried and true principle in psychological measurement that declares the following. Self-assessment has a positive effect on the behavior being appraised. If, for example, you keep track of money spent on soft drinks, the act of measuring will reduce the number of drinks. If – in fitness – you keep track of miles walked, you tend to walk more. If, in a relationship, you measure the amount of time spent with your wife, the time count will necessarily increase – independent of any other intervention.

3. Exercise together: This is win-win. Both you and your spouse benefit from the exercise and – additionally - the relationship benefits from the time together.

4. Sign up for a class together: Community college: ballroom dancing, cooking, art appreciation, and gardening. Then you can carry her books and – later – help her with her homework.

5. Work your way through a “One Tank Trips” book together: Extra points if you try this one. Most communities offer excursion guides to places within a half-tank of gas from home. It’s a great way to learn about your region while enjoying personal time.

6. Volunteer together: This is another “two-fer.” Doing good, together with your wife and growing your marriage in the context of service to the community.

7. Take it in turns to organize a “mystery adventure date”, once a month: The key here – when it’s your turn – is do the research to find out what she enjoys. It could be a weekend tour of local lighthouse, or the night launch of a space shuttle, or a simple picnic on a tablecloth in her favorite state park, or a series of local museums.  Use your imagination, make it count, take turns.

8. Step out together down memory lane: Collate and organize some scrapbooks that document family history – on both sides of the tree. You’ll end up retelling the stories, laughing together, remembering, spending time together, plus you will have a resource that you’ll treasure the rest of your lives.

9. Interview some elderly relatives: Work up the questions together, record or video the dialog, and take photographs.  She’ll love that you’re interested in her family – you’ll be astounded how much cool stuff you’ll learn.

10. Interview one-another: Help each other come up with a list of questions, and then go through the process. Take notes, listen, learn, and take it from there!

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