My wife recently showed me an old video from when our oldest son, Connor, was only 2 years old. I was out cutting the grass, and he was right behind me with his toy mower. When I stopped, he stopped. When I pulled the cord to restart the lawnmower, he pretended to do it on his. We laughed at how cute it was, and she started to well up with some tears at the fond memory.
Kids are very observant and are copycats by nature. They watch every single thing you do, and it shapes them. You have a very impactful position in your kids’ lives, and the way they develop into adults is often a direct reflection of the job you are doing as a father. Being a good example to your child is important. Here are 4 examples you need to set for your kids.
1. Showing Up Even When It’s Inconvenient
Great dads make sacrifices for their family. That might look like deciding to choose your daughter’s recital instead of taking your friend’s extra ticket to a baseball game or rescheduling a meeting at work so you won’t be home late on your wife’s birthday. If you shudder at the thought of doing these things, you need to get your priorities straight. If you don’t, your kids’ priorities won’t be straight, either.
2. Avoiding Slippery Slopes at All Costs
Steer away from the things that might threaten your integrity, your marriage, or your family’s wellbeing. If you have a peer at work who repeatedly urges you to cut corners like he does, stop eating lunch with that guy. If being on Instagram means you spiral down rabbit holes of looking at women who aren’t your wife, delete your account. No momentary convenience, pleasure, or loophole is worth pursuing if it also going to damage your integrity or devastate your family.
3. Prioritizing Your Wife
A friend told me early in my marriage to make sure to “keep dating my wife”. I thought that sounded a little weird, and then we had our first child. Life gets busy, and too many times, your personal schedule gets dictated by everything you are doing for your kids’ extra curricular activities. Make sure you intentionally make time for your wife. Schedule date nights in your calendar like you would a work meeting. Show your sons an example of how they should treat their wives when they get married and your daughters an example of how their husbands should treat them.
4. Filtering What You Are Watching and Listening To
I love a great action flick, but I realized some of the movies I watched, especially the ones rated R, weren’t good to watch in front of my kids. I realized the crude humor or excessive violence wasn’t bringing out the best in me. Then I paid attention to the lyrics of the music I was listening to, and some of the messages didn’t align with who I am. Start choosing media that represents the family values that you want to model for your kids. This will benefit you and them.
Sound off: What are some additional ways we all can work on being a good example for our kids?
Huddle up with your kids and ask, “Who in your life sets a good example for you?”