character-traits

5 Character Traits You Want to Rub Off on Your Kids

Allow me to brag on my alma mater for a second. My beloved UCONN Huskies won the school’s sixth men’s basketball national championship in 2024. They were the first team in nearly 20 years to win back-to-back NCAA Tournaments. A few days after the confetti had fallen, I came across a video of UCONN’s coach, Dan Hurley, revealing his coaching secret. When asked how he gets such talented 18-year-olds to come to frigid Connecticut, he said he doesn’t solely recruit the players. He also recruits the parents. That’s because, in his words, “The wrong type of people in the inner circle around your players will sink your program.”

Hurley can tell a lot about what kind of player he’s getting just by the way his parents speak and behave. What an amazing lesson we can apply in our homes. Your kids may never play high-level sports, but they will be on some kind of team one day. They’ll be spouses, employees, and community members, and how they interact with other “teammates” will be largely based on the things you teach them. You are your child’s primary example. Make sure you’re modeling something of value. Here are 5 character traits you want to rub off on your kids.

1. Commitment

I learned the importance of hard work from a few veterans when I was a young quarterback in the NFL. I watched guys put in extra time in the weight room, throw balls after practice, and study game film like crazy in an attempt to get better. The people who are the most committed in the pursuit of greatness are usually the ones who find it. Talent only gets people so far. Effort, drive, and passion get you over the finish line. Show commitment around your children, expecting it to rub off.

2. No Excuses

If you were late because there was an accident on the highway or didn’t have enough money for date night because the car broke down, it’s OK. Those things were outside of your control. Those are not excuses. They are explanations. Now, if you were late because you were watching TV or can’t afford date night because you bought shoes, those are excuses. They are totally different. Excuses are used to justify failing at things that were within your control. Teach your kids the difference, and preach “no excuses.

3. Accountability

When you say “I’ll be there,” actually be there. People are counting on you. People will be counting on your children, too. Don’t give them the out that they never saw their dad being accountable. Be the most honest, high-character, high-integrity man in their life and then hold them accountable to that same standard. Dads, we need to own it when we fall short. We need to take responsibility and have accountability.

4. Never Quitting

Dads should quit vices. Dads should definitely give up destructive things. But I’m not talking about quitting things that are obviously bad. How do you react when things get difficult? Giving up is usually the easiest option for a reason. Just because something has proven to be harder than expected doesn’t mean walking away is the right choice. If we make it a habit to give up when things get tough, we’re giving our kids the green light to do the same. They will struggle. They will want to quit. You’ll make it a lot easier if you pave the way.

5. Selflessness

A big reason why UCONN won the 2024 championship was the team’s selflessness. Only one other team in the nation had more assists per game than UCONN. Assists is one of those basketball stats that says a lot about who you are as a group. It demonstrates you care about the team’s success more than just your own. I bet a lot of the parents Coach Hurley talked with are selfless people. It’s cool to think that character trait rubbed off on their kids, and eventually produced champions.

Sound off: What character traits do you want to start prioritizing more in your life?

Huddle up with your kids and ask, “What do you think is the most important character trait you’ll need for the future?”