Ever heard of Mickey Mouse Park? No, it’s not a new Disney attraction opening this summer. It was Walt Disney’s failed attempt at launching a theme park. Disney hoped to build a place near his Burbank, California studio where families could gather to enjoy animation and imagination. Unfortunately, he couldn’t get enough financial backing or form an attractive vision for his park. He learned from his personal failure, dreamed up a new plan, and eventually built the global sensation Disneyland in 1955.
Disney wasn’t afraid of failure. He didn’t pretend it wouldn’t happen, either. Do you have this mindset? No matter how proficient we are, we will fail as dads, husbands, employees, and leaders to some degree. We’re not perfect, but we don’t have to be. We can take failures in stride, learn, and adapt for the sake of future success. When the inevitable happens, remember the 4 A’s of flourishing after personal failure.
1. Acknowledge
If you don’t recognize your failures, you’re either in denial or living in a blind spot. Identify your failures by taking regular stock of wins and losses in business, relationships, and hobbies. Ask yourself, “When and where did I go wrong?” Pin down errors and admit them to yourself. Be mature enough to tell yourself the truth. Ignoring failure is running from accountability. You owe it to yourself to be the best version of you possible. It starts with acknowledging you’re not perfect, and that’s OK.
2. Address
It’s natural to have big emotions after failure. It’s OK to feel them. Getting down about mistakes is understandable, but getting through those feelings requires addressing the root cause. Investigate your failure! Diagnose the problem. Disney did this. He realized that the appetite for his original vision wasn’t there, so he talked to the creative team around him to see what he could have said or done differently to make a theme park work in California. Addressing it when we mess up shows our peers, spouses, and kids that it’s OK to make mistakes and that we don’t have to be imprisoned by them.
3. Aspire
Determining to be better today than yesterday is how we grow as leaders, parents, and spouses. Growing after mistakes is a chance to make goals and stick to them. Set achievable goals by talking to others who have gone through the same problems and get their perspective. Draft a plan and hold yourself to it. Use past failures to spur you to future success.
4. Adapt
Adapt after mistakes so you don’t repeat them. If one thing doesn’t work, get creative to find out what will. Legendary college basketball coach Dean Smith preached this to his players. He told them to learn from every misstep on the court. It’s OK to make mistakes, but adjusting your approach means you don’t have to make the same mistakes over and over again. Think about what didn’t work and, through trial and error, figure out what will.
Sound off: How do you deal with mistakes?
Huddle up with your kids and ask, “What’s the best way to deal with failure?”