NFL owners are considering having more regular season games, and fewer pre-season games.  What do you think of that proposal?  Leave your comments below and let me know.  And, in case you’re wondering, here’s what I think of adding more games to the regular season.

For the first time in more than 30 years, this off-season is really an off-season for me.  While my friends, and fellow All Pro Dads, Mike Tomlin, Leslie Frazier and Clyde Christensen have the upcoming NFL season on their minds, my thoughts are now occupied with things besides training camp, free agents and pre-season games. 

I’ll admit, it’s different, but it’s also good.  I knew this season of my life would come, and I did my best to prepare for it.  And as I’ve said before, I didn’t leave football because it wasn’t fun anymore; I left because I knew there were other things-important to me-that I wanted to do with my life.  The book of Ecclesiastes talks about the seasons of life, and how there’s a time, and season, for everything.  The book also talks about how fleeting life is. 

Now consider those two things: the seasons of life and the brevity of life, and apply them to raising your children.  Our children are only in our homes for a relatively short while.  Yes, you may want an “off season” from parenting when your kids are in challenging stages, but remember that with perseverance, love, and prayer, those stages will pass as your children move into a different and, hopefully, less stressful season of life.  In the meantime, use your downtime from work-your off season-to be with your kids.

I may be a retired NFL coach, but I love pro basketball too.  In fact, there are two, young NBA players who have really impressed me.

Whenever my children have a school holiday, we try to do something special together, something that will be fun for the whole family. This past weekend we took a visit to the Clearwater Marine Aquarium.  It turned out to be a fun and educational experience. 

 The Aquarium is home to freshwater and saltwater fish and mammals that have been injured or orphaned.  The Aquarium has a great staff who works with the animals to rehabilitate them.  Our family saw otters, turtles, stingrays and dolphins.  We got to see them up close, to pet, and even feed some of the animals.  We learned about their natural habits and how some things were different for them in the aquarium environment.

Our kids learned a lesson in how we can help others (in this case animals) and how rewarding that can be.  The highlight of the day was the dolphin show. We saw them perform lots of tricks and even got splashed a little.  But it was all in fun, and that was probably the best part.  Everyone was able to find something to enjoy and we had fun as a family.

P.S.

I want to especially thank Tom Orr, who served as our tour guide

Here are a couple of pictures from our day…

My daughter Jade and Oscar the otter

At the Dolphin Show

All Pro Dad is heading up to Georgia on June 20th for our Father & Kids Experience with University of Georgia Head Coach, Mark Richt. It’s great getting to know him.

Last week I spoke to a group of students at Durant High School, near Tampa.  Durant’s basketball coach, Jeff Shotwell, hosts monthly workshops for his players and students where people come in and talk about what it takes to be successful.  He wants to build his team into a group that thinks like winners; but not just on the court; he wants them to win in life—in their schoolwork, in their community, and at home. 

 I enjoyed talking to them about being “Uncommon;” about being good students, good teammates, and good citizens.  I talked about not only success, but significance also.  I talked about long-term goals and how these young people should see themselves in the future. 

 It’s one of my favorite things to do—talking to teenagers and trying to get them to see the big picture; what they want to do with their lives and where God fits into it all.   I’m encouraged by the number of high school kids who want to set a great example at their schools.

 On a different night last week, my wife Lauren and I went with Abe Brown Ministries to visit The Leslie Peters Halfway House in Tampa.  This center houses young men ages 14 to 18 who have had trouble with the law.  It was a very moving experience as we participated in the bible service that is the norm for Tuesday nights there.  The young men were attentive, polite and very engaging.  After some bible reading and singing (most of which was done by a Christian rap group), I got to talk to the young men for about 20 minutes. We followed that up with some picture-taking (I’ve posted a photo and a video of us and the Leslie Peters staff) and got a chance to talk one-on-one with many of the boys.

Me with the Leslie Peters Staff

I was really impressed with the staff and the programs that were in place to help these young men. They seemed to have a great rapport with the boys and it was a very comfortable atmosphere.  When we threw it open for questions and answers we got a chance to understand some of the problems the boys are dealing with.  But it was our hope to give these young men encouragement and help them as they’re learning to make better life choices.

What I learned from our visit was to be thankful for the parents I had and the environment I grew up in.  Some of the boys we talked to had grown up in a stable family environment and admitted that they didn’t always listen to their parents’ advice.  But many of them haven’t had the guidance and direction that they needed; so it may not have been entirely their fault that they started down the wrong path—but  now they’re the ones who are going to have to change that direction. They have to take control of their lives.  That really starts with changing from the inside out and letting Christ guide them in making those decisions.  Even if they don’t have a parent there to guide them, Christ can do that for them.

We finished with a time of prayer and we left with some new friends and a hope that these young men would move forward, get back in school, and look to the future.

Fathers play a critical role in our society. Here are some of my thoughts on the impact that fathers can have in the lives of their children.

I wanted to share with you an article I recently wrote for Sports Illustrated: 

As I was preparing to visit Michael Vick at the federal penitentiary in Leavenworth, Kansas, earlier this month, I got a phone call from Ron Freeman. His son Josh is the Kansas State quarterback who was the first-round pick by the Buccaneers last month. We had never met, but we spoke father-to-father. Ron asked me if I would call Josh and keep an eye on him as he was getting used to his new environment in Tampa, where I make my home. As we talked, I could tell Ron and his wife had done a great job in preparing their son, and Josh was probably one of the few NFL rookies who wouldn’t need much mentoring. But his dad was going that extra mile for his son.

Then I went to see Michael. As I sat down with him at the table in the visitors’ room, he looked just like many of the young men I have talked with in other prisons. I couldn’t get over how young he still looked. I hadn’t seen him in person since 2005, but his face looked the same. The Falcons’ number 7 jersey, though, had been replaced by a tan jumpsuit with his inmate number on it. We talked for about two hours, and my message was the same one I’ve given hundreds of other inmates I’ve visited. “What you learn in life is the same thing you learn in football,” I told Michael, who was scheduled to be released from prison this Wednesday to serve the final two months of his 23-month sentence in home confinement. “You have losses, and you have to rebound from them. The key thing is, How do you bounce back from a defeat?”

In the two hours we spent together, Michael and I learned a lot about each other, and we made a commitment to stay in touch after he is released. When I left the prison, I found myself thinking: What if Michael, who says his father was not a positive influence on his household when he grew up, had had the same family support system that Josh had? Would he have ended up in this situation? I really don’t think so.

That’s one of the reasons I left the Colts a few months ago. People ask me all the time why I retired, and it wasn’t from stress or burnout. In my mind I didn’t retire from football as much as I was moving to something else. I wanted to do something to help the next generation of young people realize their potential. As a coach I was blessed to have developed a bond with many of my players. But I always felt that those who made it to the NFL were, for the most part, men who had gotten some good mentoring along the way. I wanted to reach out to young men who hadn’t had the benefit of college and NFL environments.

I’ve always been drawn to young men and the issue of fatherhood because of the impact my dad had on me. I leaned on him for advice for 48 years, and he shaped me into the man I am today. I’ll never forget being thrown out of a basketball game in ninth grade for fighting. (I know that’s hard for people to imagine after watching me on the sidelines.) Afterward, my dad calmly told me how he saw it. “You let your emotions help your opponent instead of your own team,” he said. “You have some talent, but you’ll never be a great player until you get those emotions under control and use them for good.” I listened to him, and that was the beginning of the “cool” Tony Dungy persona.

As a Christian, I follow the Biblical model of how a community should be structured-wisdom should be passed down from elders to juniors, and when that doesn’t happen the results won’t be good. That’s why I’m concerned about the number of young men growing up without active fathers in their lives. This is an increasing problem all across society but especially in African-American homes.

It’s ironic that, as I’m leaving pro football, one of the people I’m trying to help was once one of the NFL’s biggest stars. But I’m concerned about Michael Vick’s life, not his career. And Michael’s future, just like those of thousands of other inmates around the country, is worth saving. Michael came into the NFL with a lot more fanfare than Josh Freeman but with less guidance. Does that excuse some of the mistakes he’s made? No. And Michael certainly had the benefit of many support people in college and the NFL. But our decision-making processes are formed much earlier than that.

I firmly believe Michael deserves a second chance in life. I understand how appalling dog fighting is, and in no way do I condone it. But he was given a punishment that the court deemed appropriate, and now he exits prison having paid for that crime. It’s time to let him bounce back after that loss. If we are willing to forgive Michael and take an honest look at the person who is leaving that prison, we might be surprised at what we see. We might see a man who says “I’m sorry” with his actions and not just his words. We might see a man who wants to get back to his three children and stop the cycle of young people growing up without a father to help them.

Least important, we might see him play football again. I’m not sure of the Michael Vick we would see on the field, but I believe we would see a very different person off the field. That’s what would be exciting to me.

Being retired has allowed me to spend more time with my family.  It has also allowed me to spend more time supporting the charitable causes I care deeply about.  Two of those causes are the Fellowship of Christian Athletes (FCA), and the American Diabetes Association (ADA). 

 Every year I have done three FCA events of their choice.  I do these to help FCA because they have been such an important ministry in my life.  FCA mixes athletics with sharing the gospel, and it is a great way for me to share my faith with people with whom I have something in common-a love of sports.  This year I’m doing only one event, a get together I attended in Iowa last week that also benefitted flood victims there.  It’s was special for me, because one of my former players, Dallas Clark, is from Iowa and he was definitely impacted by last year’s floods.

I was also able to give some time to the American Diabetes Association last week.  I’ve been involved with the ADA since the death of my mom from diabetes-related problems in 2002.  African American adults are disproportionally affected by diabetes, and the more I learned about it, the more it made me want to do something to help.  Eli Lilly and Company, which is headquartered in Indianapolis, has done a lot in the area of research-trying to find a cure for diabetes.  They have also done a lot in the Indianapolis area in terms of educating young people about lifestyle decisions that can help prevent type 2 diabetes.  Every year I have gone to visit the elementary school in Indianapolis that has raised the most money on their school walk for diabetes prevention.  I’ve also gone to dinner with someone who has won that bid in a charity auction.  So, on May 12, I visited and dined to support the efforts of those who are trying to find a cure for this disease.

I am really excited about being in Canton, OH for the Hall of Fame All Pro Dad Father & Kids Experience on June 6th. If you live in the area, I’d love to see you there with your kids! Check out the event TV Spot below.