Dungy's Diary

Why Marriage is Like Football

 

Think back to when you first fell in love with your wife. You couldn’t get enough of her, and your heart was going 100 miles per hour. To me it is very similar to a football game. Learn how from Chapter 11 of mine and Lauren’s new book, Uncommon Marriage.

“I compare it (marriage) to playing a football game. You start off with energy fueled by adrenaline for the opening kickoff. You’re so pumped up, and there’s just nothing like it. The whistle blows and your find yourself flying down the field 100 miles per hour. But you don’t have enough adrenaline in your body to keep the emotion at that level for sixty minutes. You have to calm down a little bit and play the rest of the game.

So many problems in marriage occur when spouses notice that the intense physical attraction is no longer there and assume that must mean that the love is gone. They figure either they’ve changed or the other person has changed, but in any event, they’re no longer getting the instant emotional payoff they had at first.”

Does that sound like your marriage? At some point this happens because you just can’t keep that up. When it happens, don’t confuse it with a problem with your spouse or your marriage. You are no longer getting that emotional high, but it’s okay. Just stay calm and play the rest of the “game.”


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  • Ken

    This is very true. You can build on emotion but you can not run solely on emotion.

  • Todd

    Having not played professional football I’ll have to take your word for it.
    I do recall the high I felt when I first met her, but all that is gone now after the divorce and I fear I’ll never be able to feel that again. What’a guy to do at that point?

  • http://www.neveragainministries.com/ Neveragainministries.com

    Great anology! I just wrote an entire book entitled “Love & Football: How to Play on the Same Team with your Spouse

  • Kris

    I believe that while the initial euphoria of marriage may wear off, the physical attraction does not need to fade. Been married over 20 years now and I think my wife is hotter than ever!

  • http://www.coachbrown.org/ Coach Brown

    Thanks Coach Dungy. Being married for 42 years myself and a former coach, I love the analogy. What I have found that replaced my youthful exuberance was our common love for God, family and each other. Just like in a game, turnovers and penalties occur, but that is why the game is never over until the final whistle is blown. Just as I coached my players, never, never, never quit! My wife and I are looking to many years enjoying our faith and family together.

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