As each year comes to a close and we approach a new year, I take each of my four kids out individually and ask them to honestly answer these questions. And what I’ve found is that it not only helps me to hear what’s in my child’s heart, it tremendously helps me be a better parent in the coming year.
Questions are powerful, because they give us a glimpse inside of another person’s heart. And one of the greatest expressions of love for a child is to simply have someone who is willing to listen to their heart. Here are the questions I ask if you’d like to try it and see for yourself.
12 questions: (for my two oldest who are teens)
1. What do you feel has been one of your greatest accomplishments in the last year?
2. What has been one of your greatest struggles this past year?
3. Has anything happened in your life in the last year that I don’t know about, but that you think I should know about?
4. If you could change one thing about the last year, what would it be?
5. If you could have one thing different in our family, what would it be?
6. How are things between you and God?
7. What is one area that you feel God is working in your life about the most right now, and is there anything specific that I can pray for you about?
8. If you were the parent, and I was your child, what would you do differently? (Or… What is one thing I do as a parent that bothers you most?)
9. What is your #1 desire or dream that you would like to see become a reality in the coming year? (Or… What is something that you really want to pursue more?)
10. What can I do to help you reach that goal?
11. What is one specific thing/event/adventure that you would like for us to do together in the coming year?
12. Is there anything (nothing is off limits) that you would like to tell me, talk about with me, or ask me about?
Finish the sentence… You feel most loved by me when _________________________________.
6 Questions: (For my younger two, 8 & 10)
1. What was your favorite part/memory from the last year?
2. What was your worst part/memory from the last year?
3. Do you feel close to God, and that God is close to you?
4. If you were my parent, and I was your child, what would you do differently? (Or… If you could have one thing different in our family, what would it be?)
5. What is something you’d like for us to do together (or do more of together) in the coming year?
6. Is there anything (nothing is off limits) that you would like to ask me or talk to me about?
Finish the sentence… You feel most loved by me when _________________________________.
Huddle up with your kids and ask, “What can I do to make you feel more loved in the coming year?”