There’s a fine line between being a faithful or foolish man. I didn’t really understand this until after I went through a divorce of a 16-year marriage. It’s ironic how relationships always seem to expose either faithful or foolish behavior.
As embarrassing as it is to admit, I realize now, I was a fool. But before you judge me, let’s be honest; we’ve all been fools. The only question is what kind of fool have we been? I hope this question doesn’t offend you, but rather enlighten you. Since I’ve confessed my little secret to you, allow me to show you the 5 ways I’ve been a fool, and see if you’re able to relate to any of these behaviors. Here are 5 ways men are foolish.
1. Simple Fool
Meaning, I simply didn’t know any better. Although I accept full responsibility for my past mistakes, as the son of a 16-year old single mom, I didn’t know, at age 22, how to be a good husband, father, and leader of my family. I had no clue what it took to be a man. I was naïve; I didn’t even know what I didn’t know. The simplest cure for being a simple fool is to ask before you act and look before you leap.
2. Stupid Fool
As a simple fool, I didn’t know any better; but as a stupid fool, even when I knew better, I didn’t always do better. So I repeatedly made mistakes I saw other men make. A good example of this was when I first started watching porn. I thought I could handle it, but I couldn’t. One radical way to avoid being stuck on being a stupid fool is to keep a journal of your mistakes. Trust me, after you read that list, you’re less likely to repeat it.
3. Stubborn Fool
I didn’t struggle with not knowing better; I just thought I knew better than everyone else. I was always right (in my own eyes), and you couldn’t tell me anything. I was quick to anger and quick to argue to justify my foolish behavior. Whenever you find yourself being a stubborn fool, break the cycle by adding this single phrase to your opinions, statements, or decisions: “But you know, I could be wrong.”
4. Scorning Fool
Yes, I knew better, but I refused to do better. I rebelled against everyone when it came to getting what I wanted. I allowed my foolishness to kill my relationships because I refused to humble myself and admit my wrongs. I knew right from wrong, but I refused to stop because I selfishly was enjoying what I was doing. The quickest way to come to your senses as a scorning fool is to always yourself, “Is this really worth everything it’s costing me?”
5. Serious Fool
I didn’t just know better than everyone else, I thought I knew better than God because I didn’t believe God’s opinion mattered. I thought I knew what was best for me, and God never figured into the equation. Unfortunately, the only way out of this type of foolishness is usually us hitting our rock bottom.Bad relationships are the result of foolish behavior.
I know you may not fully agree with my assessment of my foolishness; but as men, I think we can agree we need to constantly check our behavior. Over the years, I’ve learned that the best way to examine foolish behavior is to always check the quality of your relationships. Bad relationships are the result of foolish behavior.
Huddle Up Question
Huddle up with your kids and ask, “What is the most foolish thing you have ever done? What is the wisest?”