If that little ‘check engine’ light comes on while you’re driving, it can make your palms sweat. Nobody likes it when unexpected problems pop up with their car. The same is true with your family. In this episode of the All Pro Dad Podcast, host Ted Lowe is joined by BJ Foster to talk about checking our gauges as parents so we can understand our kids better and prevent breakdowns in our parent–child relationship.

Checking in with kids is even more important than getting a timely oil change. It’s what keeps the gears turning properly in your home. Dads must understand the challenges their kids are facing. Enjoy this thoughtful conversation all geared toward molding men into finely tuned dads.   

Why This Matters

If we want our kids to thrive, we must be tuned in to what’s going on in their lives.

The 5 Gauges
1. The Friend Gauge: Who are your kids hanging out with?
2. The School Gauge: How are things going in the classroom?
3. The Sports Gauge: how are extracurricular activities shaping your kids?
4. The Feelings Gauge: Understanding their emotions is paramount.
5. The Dad Gauge: To lead your family well, you must take care of yourself.

Important Episode Timestamps

00:00 – 00:54 | Introduction & This Week’s Big Question
Ted Lowe and BJ Foster open the episode and introduce the question: What are five essential gauges to look for when raising kids?

01:54 – 03:15 | A “Parental Gotcha” Story That Sparked the Idea
Ted shares a revealing moment with his now-grown son that led to a powerful reflection on missed signs.

03:15 – 07:07 | Gauge #1: The Friend Gauge
Why your child’s friendships are one of the biggest indicators of who they’re becoming—and how to stay involved.

07:07 – 09:02 | Gauge #2: The School Gauge
How academic performance and teacher feedback can offer insight into your child’s emotional and social health.

09:02 – 14:09 | Gauge #3: The Sports & Activities Gauge
What extracurriculars say about your kid’s influences—and how cluster friendships play a bigger role than you might think.

14:09 – 20:18 | Gauge #4: The Feelings Gauge
How to spot and support your child’s emotional world without jumping to fix or lecture.

20:18 – 21:23 | Safe & Strong: What Kids Really Need from Dads
Why emotional safety is the foundation for open, trusting relationships with your child.

21:23 – 24:55 | Gauge #5: The Dad Gauge
The importance of self-care—mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually—to show up well for your family.

24:55 – 26:04 | Progress Over Perfection: A Word of Encouragement
A reminder that checking in and being consistent is more valuable than doing it all perfectly.

26:04 – 27:12 | Pro Move of the Week
Choose one of the five gauges to check in on this week—with your child, your spouse, or yourself.

Sponsor:
The All Pro Dad Podcast is proudly brought to you by Family First, a nonprofit dedicated to equipping parents with resources to strengthen their families. Learn more at FamilyFirst.net.