Our house is filled with triplet boys. They are fun, rambunctious, and loud. You can imagine what our poor daughter contends with having three older brothers. Although they can be sweet and protective of their baby sister, many times she’s in danger of being run over. She has to have a level of toughness in order to make herself heard and perhaps even survive. I’m definitely guilty of being overprotective of her.
However, the world our kids will go into is a tough one and it can be especially difficult for girls. They’ll need grit in order to thrive. How do we impart determination, passion, and perseverance to our daughters? How do we set them up well so they have the strength to thrive in a challenging world? By imparting and teaching grit. Here are 5 ways to teach your daughter to have grit.
1. Help her find and nurture her passions.
If your daughter is going to have grit at all, it is going to start with what she loves. You need to help her find what she is passionate about and help her pursue it. A great place to start is figuring out how she is talented. She’ll have curiosities toward areas of study or abilities that will come naturally. Study her, ask questions, and talk with her about pursuing her passions.
2. Let her fight her own battles.
As much as I want to protect my daughter (and I know there are times when I need to step in), she needs to learn how to fight her own battles. At the end of the day, fighting her own battles, even with a sibling, will build the perseverance needed to overcome difficulty. Daughters may need our guidance in how to do it or how to improve, but we need to make sure the experience is theirs.
3. Encourage failure.
Our girls cannot be afraid of failure. That is essential in teaching grit. They have to be willing to take risks. People who have grit are willing to step out and fail over and over again without letting it deter them. In order to do that, our daughters need to embrace failure as a part of the journey to success. So encourage failure and help your daughter keep going after tough setbacks.
4. Teach her how to finish strong.
Teach her that when she starts something she needs to finish it. Ensuring that she completes assignments and chores is a great practical exercise. However, when teaching grit, it is even more important to show them how to finish strong. This is especially true when the task or subject is difficult. We need to show our girls how to overcome the tendency to fade and lose concentration by overcoming that tendency in ourselves. Talk to her about it, encourage it, but even more so, model it.
5. Help her think long-term.
It’s one thing to have passion, but we also need to know where we are going. We have to be working toward something. Help your daughter think about the long-term goal. Ask her questions about where she wants to be years down the road. What does she want her life to look like? How does she want to impact the world? Ask her what skills she needs to develop in order to do those things. Then help her set both long-term and short-term goals.
Sound off: What do you think is the best way to teach daughters grit?
Huddle up with your kids and ask, “What do you think it means to have grit?”