good father

A Real New Year’s Resolution: Becoming a Good Father and Husband

45% of Americans usually make New Year’s resolutions. Of those that try to turn over that new leaf, only 8% of them are successful. Things like lose the weight, get organized, and get fit, are in the top 10 resolutions people make each new calendar year. In the 10th spot was the generic phrase, “spend more time with family.” How is that a priority behind losing weight and being more organized? It should be at the head of the list, and we’ll look at ways to accomplish that.

It is a sincere and aware heart seeking self-improvement that makes a New Year’s resolution. [Tweet This] The trouble is, they are often broad and vague promises. In order to get real results, it needs to be broken down into more specific and measurable goals. That way, we can get a true sense of progress in the changes we are trying to make.

Here are but a few New Year’s resolutions that will get you real results, if your goal is to become a good father and husband.

1. Pledge One-on-One Time with Each Child

Your kids love you and want to spend time with you. They need individual attention in addition to the family setting. Pledge to spend time alone with each child on a regular basis. This can be done doing a favorite sport or hobby together or taking them out to do things they are interested in. You can even just hang at home away from gadgets and media. This will get the results of building a closer bond and will enhance your needed influence on their personal growth.

2. Pledge to Listen to Your Family

Regarding family, a lot of men are “Just tell me what I need to know” type people. We don’t like getting bogged down in all the particulars. That works well for time efficiency, but it leaves your family feeling misunderstood and ignored. If your goal is to spend more time with them, this is the first place to start: listen to what both your wife and children need to say.

3. Once a Month Date Night

Your spouse also needs your individual attention, and you certainly need hers. The chaos and busyness of family life can swallow adult relationship time until there’s nothing left. This is a common cause of marital affairs. The more designated time the better, but at the minimum, pledge to have at least one date night per month with your wife.

4. Find People that Challenge You

Men too often have a lone wolf mentality when it comes to asking for help or sharing their stresses. To significantly increase the odds of success with a resolution, we need to find others that will hold us accountable. In my own life, I often lean on my pastor for mentorship when it comes to family and marriage, and I have a core of men behind me that I also trust. I know they will shoot straight with me. Don’t go it alone. Seek out those who’ve done what you’re trying to do and ask for their help.

Sound Off

What are your New Year’s resolutions for the coming year?

  • I like #4 regarding finding men who will challenge (support, encourage, pray for) you. Pledges are a GREAT step and signify a genuine desire to do better but without encouragement, prayer and accountability – even the best of us will struggle.

    The once a month date night is also good as I like the small step of once a month. Everyone of us can do once a month – but do we every month and is it planned and on the calendar. For my wife, the anticipation of the date night is almost as important as the date night!

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Huddle up with your kids and ask, “What would you like to see change this year?”

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