In my early twenties, I spent a summer working at a GM dealership, changing oil, fixing tires, and doing odd jobs around the shop. Whenever I did an oil change, I was also required to perform a 27-point inspection, examining fluid levels, testing light bulbs, and checking for leaks under the car. While this was by no means an exhaustive mechanical inspection, the 27 points were important questions to ask as they often caught potential concerns before they became more serious.
Regularly asking ourselves important questions will reveal how our behavior hurts our wives and families.While there’s no manual or multi-point inspection form that comes with being a husband, we might all benefit from a regular experience of self-examination. Regularly asking ourselves important questions will reveal how our behavior hurts our wives and families. It’ll uncover potential concerns and give us the chance to work on them before they become more serious. Here are 27 important questions to ask ourselves.
- Do I plan to get enough sleep on a day-to-day basis?
- Am I taking care of myself, eating well, and staying physically active?
- Am I managing my time well among family, work, and healthy recreation?
- Do I love gaming, sports, or Netflix so much that I regularly choose to stay up late instead of going to bed with my wife?
- Do I have a hobby that consumes me so much that I miss important family moments?
- Am I battling a habit or addiction related to drinking, drugs, or pornography? Am I seeking help to overcome this?
- Am I willing to try new things, fail, and learn from the experience?
- Do I constantly want things I don’t have, that I’m jealous of others for having, and/or that I can’t actually afford?
- Am I responsible with my family’s money?
- Do I waste time at work on meaningless things and have to bring work home with me, essentially denying my wife and kids focused time?
- Does my pride mean I consistently wait for my wife to say “I’m sorry” before I do?
- Do I consistently express healthy physical affection to my wife (even when it has nothing to do with sex)?
- Am I creative and deliberate in spending time with my wife?
- Have I invested in any of my wife’s interests, or do I simply expect her to love whatever I love?
- Do I ever let a day go by in which I don’t compliment and thank my wife for who she is and all she does for our family?
- Do I allow my mind and imagination to linger on women I find attractive?
- Do I maintain healthy physical and emotional boundaries with women who are not my wife?
- Do I allow the long or difficult day I had at work to keep me from pulling my weight with the household chores and responsibilities?
- Do I ever ask my wife how her day has been (and then listen for the answer)?
- Do I take my wife’s willingness and commitment to our family and home for granted?
- Can each of my kids say that their dad offers his full and undivided attention to them?
- Am I willing to “waste” time with my kids doing things even if I think they’re childish?
- Can I name three things that each of my kids loves to do?
- Am I an example to my kids of healthy affectionate touch?
- Do my kids see that I celebrate their greatest successes alongside them?
- Do my kids know that I grieve their sorrows and failures right alongside them?
- How often do I pray for my wife and kids?
Sound off: Can you add one other important question to ask to the list above?
Huddle up with your kids and ask, “What do you think are some of the best ways to improve ourselves?”