define success

4 Lies Men Believe about Being “Successful”

If a man turns on a tv, opens his internet browser, walks past any magazine rack, or drives past billboards, he is confronted on all sides by one thing – lies about what he’s supposed to be and how we define success. Primarily, those lies revolve around 4 things:

  1. Money
  2. Sex
  3. Material possessions
  4. Glory & fame

Our culture demands that men believe those things are what define success; yet that same culture is full of depression, divorce, disease, debt, delusion, and crime. Is that success, or just a hollow shell of existence? But a truth that runs counter to these lies is that giving, serving, integrity, and sacrifice lead to genuine happiness, prosperity, and lasting success. We do have a choice. What are the lies men believe about life success? Let’s take a look.

1. Financial Status Determines Importance

Envy is a rotten apple that we are constantly prodded to bite. We place those with the most on high pedestals and then seethe as to why it’s not us. Envy is what is marketed to men on every available medium, and the solution to getting what we want is greater financial status. We are told only men of wealth and power matter. It’s a lie but it’s fed to us on a daily basis and we swallow it. Don’t believe it.

2. Vanity

Think of another dad that you truly admire. That guy that motivates you to be a better husband and father. Does anything about him remind you of the imagery we are sold about manly success? The image of the impeccably dressed-for-success man, and his smoking hot supermodel wife and perfect kids? You probably answered no, because the guy you admire is not like that at all. In reality, he’s ordinary on the outside, but his intangibles are off the charts. Committed, faithful, loyal, wise, patient, strong yet compassionate. We aren’t sold that guy.

3. More Stuff Will Make Me Happy

In reality, more stuff = more headaches. We are led to believe that the bigger house, the luxury car, the boat at the lake, and all that nonsense will make our lives happier and better. Nothing is wrong with any of those things. Except they are just that…things. They have no ability to affect emotional stability. There are great numbers of men living simple existences that are infinitely happier than those busy gathering stuff attempting to buy joy. Happiness comes from the satisfaction of living life with integrity.

Happiness comes from the satisfaction of living life with integrity.

4. Always Take the Credit and Glory

The unsung hero is not who men are taught to strive to become. We love our heroes and icons, even though more times than not the reality is they are taking far more credit and glory than they deserve. Successful outcomes require many moving parts working in unison, and rarely can one man alone save the day. But that’s the lie we believe. That only the one given and taking the credit and glory matters. However, there is a beauty and power in being the man who gives credit to those around him. He’ll truly be a success.