“How was your day?” my wife would ask.
“It was fine,” I would reply.
“Did anything interesting happen?”
One day, my wife expressed her frustration with the fact that I never opened up about my day. In my mind, I didn’t want to rehash the frustrating parts of my workday and I didn’t want to bore her with mundane details. But I didn’t realize that this is one of the things wives expect from their husbands. She just wanted me to share with her. It is as simple as that. She didn’t care if I had a funny story, if I was frustrated with a coworker, or if I had an idea to increase my productivity. She just wanted me to share, no matter what.When we share intimately with our wives, our wives feel closer to us, which is what they desire the most.
As husbands, we want to take care of things on our own. We don’t want to bore our wives or burden them with our anxiety. We don’t want them to see our weaknesses, or we don’t think they would be interested. But consider this. When we share intimately with our wives, our wives feel closer to us, which is what they desire the most. When you don’t open up, you deny her that. Our wives are there for us and they want us to share with them. Here are 6 things wives desperately want their husbands to share.
1. Your Daily Life
Wives want to know what’s going on in our daily lives. Most of us spend a large portion of the day at work and away from our wives. When we come home, they don’t expect us to give a blow by blow recap of the day, but they do want us to engage with them.
2. Your Anxiety
Anxiety is common and stems from a variety of sources including work, health issues, and bills. Our anxiety often causes stress, which can manifest in many ways. We may be grumpier with our wives and kids or we may be more withdrawn at home. Sharing our anxiety can help in two ways. It allows our spouses to understand potential mood swings and to understand our situation. More importantly, it allows our wives to commiserate or comfort us to help us through the situation.
3. Your Joy
When something positive happens in your life, your wife should be the first to know. That’s one of the things wives expect from their husbands. Our wives should be the first ones we go to in bad times and good times. Whether we get a promotion or raise at work, we buy a winning lottery ticket, our favorite team gets a big win, or anything else, we need to share that moment with them. The more personal the joy is, the more important it is that we share it.
4. Your Plans
If there is something we want to do, an ambition we have, we should include our wives in our plans and give them the opportunity to provide input and support. When we have a goal, we often become distracted or preoccupied, and we may have additional stress. If we don’t share this with our wives, it may lead to conflict in our relationships. If we share our goals, they will have a better understanding of our changes in behavior, and they will have the opportunity to contribute.
5. The Credit
Whether we are raising kids, renovating our homes, or having success at work, our wives’ support helps us and allows us to succeed. Without them, we would often be lost. We need to remember this when we have success and we need to make sure we thank them publicly and privately.
6. Your Attention
When my daughter was very young, there were times she wanted my attention, but I was focused on my computer or the television. She would sit on my lap and put her face directly between mine and whichever screen had my attention so that I had to focus on her. Our wives want this same attention, but their methods are much more subtle. We need to be sure to make time for them without forcing them to get in our faces.
Sound off: Of the things wives expect from their husbands, what surprised you most after you got married?
Huddle Up Question
Huddle up with your kids and ask, “What were the worst and best parts of your day?”