“Confidence is contagious. So is lack of confidence.” – Vince Lombardi. Our daughters are under direct and intended assault to undermine their confidence, which in turn breeds a massive industry that profits from their shattered self-images. It’s important for dads to know how to build confidence in our daughters.
Dads with daughters have a chief obligation to instill confidence balanced with humility starting at an early age. The pitfalls to avoiding such are staggering. Drug abuse, teen pregnancy, poor grades, and even suicide all breed from low self-esteem for girls. Once the pattern is set, they may never break free. Here are some tips for raising daughters to be confident.
1. Listen to Her.
Many women feel like they aren’t heard. Honest communication can solve the majority of problems our families face, yet it can sometimes be so difficult to achieve. When she reaches out, she wants to talk–not be lectured or scolded. As dads, our instinct is to fix the things bothering her, but in many cases, she just needs us to help her work through it herself.
2. Tell Her She is Beautiful.
I once read a stat that stated only 2% of women think they are beautiful. That is tremendously sad and speaks to something wrong in our culture. Hug your daughter and tell her she is beautiful daily. If a dad doesn’t hug his teen daughter and tell her he loves her every day, she will find someone that will. That sets off a dangerous pattern of seeking beauty affirmation.
3. Reinforce Her Strong Qualities.
We are all given special talents. As your daughter is discovering hers, reinforce them with your praise and relentless support as if you are building the foundation of a great structure.
4. Be Her Rock.
Girls are more apt to be subject to things such as cyberbullying and mean-spirited personal attacks, which can destroy them emotionally. We need to be the rock our daughters can always count on to love them unconditionally. The confidence you instill counterbalances the confidence being destroyed on the outside.
5. Be Careful with Words.
It’s no secret that females are very analytical about the things males say. Of course, we need to discipline our children and at times we have to be harsh, but we need to be very careful with the words we choose at these moments. Our daughters will hold on to them longer than we know.
6. Show Her the Power of Faith.
A person that can gain the ability to see the larger picture will always have an edge in life. Regarding confidence, if your daughter understands the deeper purposes of life and the ebbs and flows she necessarily must go through, she will be much stronger. Introduce her to faith and display it by example daily.
Sound off: What do you think is the biggest cause when our daughters lack of confidence?
Huddle up with your kids and ask, “What are you feeling when someone doesn’t like you?”