I recently heard of an initiative in Mexico to create something called wedleases. The idea is based on the studies that show half of all marriages don’t last. So, instead of wedlock, a better way would be to allow a couple to lease a spouse, with the option to buy or marry them later. I can probably end this post right now based on the level of absurdity right there.
This week happens to be National Marriage Week which Newsweek says “presents a chance to focus on rebuilding a culture of marriage for this generation.” Ideas like wedleases make things like National Marriage Week important, but on a smaller scale, we can all do our part. If we want to rebuild the culture of marriage, we must start with our own marriages. Here are 5 ways to help rebuild the importance of marriage—starting with your own.
1. Set a foundation of sacrificial love.
One of the first big lessons I learned in marriage was about myself, I was selfish. We must love our wives in a way that puts their needs above ours.
2. Make our wives feel special.
Our wives are to be set apart, to stand out from every other relationship. This even includes our kids. Take a look at your calendar and your bank account. How much of both are you investing in your wife?
3. Get rid of some stuff.
Early in my marriage, I realized I couldn’t keep the same crew. I couldn’t go to the same places and I couldn’t spend time on things that could potentially cause challenges in our marriage. For you, that could be as minor as less golf or fewer hours at work to something as major as changing careers or no longer visiting certain sites on the Internet.
4. Talk, but listen more.
Communication is key in our marriages. Be transparent in sharing what’s on your heart and mind. Even more important, take the time to listen to your wife, without going into problem-solving mode. My challenge is that I immediately attempt to solve my wife’s problems, but sometimes she just wants me to listen.
5. Be the example.
As you get right internally, it’s time to show what marriage can look like. I’m not saying parade all over the place talking about your marriage. But find a couple or couples to spend time with and share what you’ve learned and experienced. Go on dates and hold hands, post pictures of you and your wife experiencing the joys you have in marriage. Don’t be afraid to show that you love your wife and your marriage.
I agree that the culture of marriage needs to be rebuilt, but it won’t happen overnight. It will take all of us who love our wives, value marriage and understand how important it is to our society. I am going to do my part, will you?
Huddle up with your wife and ask, “What would you change about our marriage?”