the influence of a father

3 Ways Dads Influence How Their Kids Win

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In 2019, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers went 7–9 and missed the playoffs. In 2020, they went 11–5 and won the Super Bowl. What changed? Well, a bunch of variables went into creating this great team. But one of the biggest influences was signing Tom Brady. The quarterback position is unique in football and greatly influences a team. 

Just like the impact a quarterback has on a team, the influence of a father on his kids is immense.

Just like the impact a quarterback has on a team, the influence of a father on his kids is immense. The QB influences the team—for good or for ill—based on his leadership. Similarly, as a dad, you have a major role in helping your child win. Here are 3 ways dads influence how their kids win. 

1. Your kids win BECAUSE of you.

The great teams win because they have great quarterbacks. From Peyton Manning to Patrick Mahomes, they are engaged in every way possible. They’re at practice before anyone and stay later. They get to know the entire team and encourage those around them. A team often takes on the personality of its quarterback. Great quarterbacks often create great teams. 

Like QBs, great fathers help their kids win because they are engaged in every way. Your kids winning because of you looks like this: when my kids ask me to do something, I try my best to say yes. Whether I’ve been traveling over a weekend or exhausted after a long day of work, when I walk through the door to my house—it’s not time to say no—it’s time to ask, “How can I help?” Sure, I can always improve in this area, but I walk around knowing the win is connecting with my kids. Imagine looking back years from now at the time invested in your kids and having no regrets.

Does your kid ask you to be a part of the things they’re passionate about?

2. Your kids win WITH you.

You don’t have to be the greatest who ever lived at the QB position to win. But you do have to show up, be present, and be consistent. It’s tough for a team to win at the professional level without a strong quarterback. 

As a dad, you may not know what it takes to lead in every situation. But, you’re there. You’re around. You’re consistent. You encourage when encouragement is needed. Be sure you’re modeling the right behaviors for your kids. You may not always have the perfect words to say, but keep showing up. Your kids will win with you if you’re consistent. 

Would your kids say you show up for them?

3. Your kids win IN SPITE OF you.

The teams that don’t have that one starting QB are often the teams that win a few games in spite of not having a strong quarterback. In some cases, you can have the guy who checks the boxes of a decent player, speaks well in interviews, and has the physical talent, but his work ethic isn’t there. Or maybe he simply makes too many mistakes, creates too many turnovers, and generally leads badly. He doesn’t model what the best QBs do. He’s not willing to put in the work and be consistent on and off the field. It’s possible to win with that guy, but it’s tough. 

Maybe you’ve been the dad whose kids are winning—but it’s in spite of you rather than because of you or with you. Perhaps you’ve made promises but something always gets in the way. Maybe you’ve said hurtful things, been overly negative, emotionally distant, or constantly sarcastic. It’s time to ask forgiveness if you’ve been this dad. I’m here to tell you your kids can still win. But they’ll win in spite of you if you don’t resist the urge to be absent or antagonistic.

Would your kids say you often say one thing but do another?

Sound off: Are your kids winning because of you, with you, or in spite of you?

Huddle up with your kids and ask, “Is there anything I can help you with right now?”