5 Questions to Consider Before Posting to Social Media

I was so angry. Our daughter came home crying over a comment her teacher made about her to the class. I determined I was going to send an email. I had it written out in my head and couldn’t wait for the technological “punch in the gut” the teacher would get when he read it. For reasons unknown, I decided to process it with my wife first. As you might imagine, that email didn’t get sent. My wife was mortified and, thankfully, she talked me down. As it turns out, it was all a big misunderstanding. Thankfully, I had an editor who kept me from letting my emotions make a huge mess of things.

Social media is dangerous because it leaps over several of these steps. It’s instantaneous. There is no editor. It allows your emotions to drive you. There’s a perception of distance. All of this can and does often result in regrettable posts that succeed in increasing vitriol and division while damaging relationships. And not only is your social media activity seen by “the world”, but more importantly it’s seen by your children. What you say and how you say it is teaching your kids a lot about who you are and how they should act. So what should you post on social media? Here are 5 questions to consider before posting.

1. Why are you posting?

What are you hoping to accomplish? Do you want to inform? Encourage? Embarrass? Vent? What’s your end goal? What is the likelihood that this is the best venue through which to accomplish your goal? Has a social media post ever caused you to think differently? If not, why do you think yours would do that for someone else? What should you post on social media? The better question might be “why would you post it?”

2. Is it true?

With the rise of AI and deepfake videos, it’s increasingly clear that we need to be diligent in our pursuit of truth. It is really easy to find something that supports what I believe and excitedly hit “share.” The problem is, it may not be true. Just because someone you think is smart says something doesn’t make it so. Do you want to speak truthfully, or do you want to feel smug in your certainty that you’re right? Those are very different things. What should you post on social media? You should post what is true.

3. Is it kind?

Look, I know being “nice” is overrated. I don’t want someone to smile at me while they steal my money. You want honest more than nice and truthful more than palatable. That said, if you speak facts in order to slam dunk on people, you’re not actually helping. Kindness is about wanting the best for the other. It’s why scripture says we are to “speak the truth in love.” That doesn’t mean you have to be sugary sweet or smiling all the time. But if your goal is to embarrass or hurt another, it doesn’t matter how true what you say is—you are part of the problem. What should you post on social media? You should post what is kind.

4. Who is this for?

Who are you hoping to reach with your rant on your particular perspective? You have 300 Facebook followers. Many of them are related to you. The vast majority of them agree with you, otherwise you’d block them or stop following them. So is this audience served in some way? What’s the benefit for the person who happens upon your post? Do your children follow you? Would you be proud to have them read what you post? How would you feel if they posted something similar? What should you post on social media? It depends on who your audience is.

5. What if you didn’t?

Imagine for just a moment that you paused. Maybe you took a deep breath and decided you wouldn’t post the rant in all caps or the link to the talk show host going off on that particular issue. What would be different in the life of the people who follow you? Would anything be lost? What would be different for you? Would the world be a teensy bit better or worse if your energies were aimed elsewhere? What should you post on social media? Sometimes “nothing” might be the best answer.

Sound off: What other questions should you consider before posting to social media?