It took a while to convince my wife to date me. One day we were having lunch and I finally told her how I felt about her. I told her that anytime we were in a crowded room together, she was the one I really wanted to talk to. Right after I said it her shoulders dropped and I could see her eyes get soft and the muscles in her face relax. Here’s the bottom line. There are compliments for women that cut right to their hearts.Nothing works its way to the core of a woman’s heart like the right words from the man she loves.
Yes, we’ve talked about this one before. But, we have reason to believe there’s still room for coaching in this area. We are 100% wrong if we think we can get by with saving “I love you” for special occasions, or believing, “I don’t have to say it every day, she already knows I love her.”
2. “You are amazingly beautiful!”
Your wife wants, needs, to hear her husband say, “You’re the most beautiful woman in the world.” She wants to know she still rattles your core. This is true if you’re newly married and in the peak of physical health; it’s true if you’re middle-aged, overweight, and worn by the cares of the world; and it’s true when you’re 92-years-old and mostly beyond repair. Tell her she’s beautiful. It happens to be true.
3. “Are you free Tuesday night for a date?”
Tell her you want her to go out! Treat her like you’re still trying to win her love. Ask her if she’s free, and then make sure the evening is special. Asking her out demonstrates respect, desire, commitment, caring enough to plan ahead, and a whole lot more. She needs to know that she is your priority. She needs to hear you articulate why your relationship is worth such a commitment of time. In fact, there is a great app called iHeartus that has date ideas and money saving deals. You and your wife can both sign up. It has creative ways to invite her on a date.
4. “Let’s go shopping together.”
Often the only input husbands offer about clothes shopping is criticism, warnings not to spend too much, and excuses to stay home. The fact is, your wife would love to have you along. And the occasional, “Buy it. You make that dress look like a million dollars. Say, why don’t we get you some shoes, too?” will be music to her ears.
5. “You make me want to be a better man.”
We borrowed this classic line from Jack Nicholson’s character in the movie As Good as It Gets. Let your wife understand that she completes you and that your relationship is something beautiful that moves you forward in your life. We all need to grow. It’s a given, and your wife wants to hear that she’s an important part of that equation.
Huddle Up Question
Huddle up with your kids and ask, “What is the best compliment you have ever received?”