divorced man

Principles for Divorced Men

Divorce is a fact of life in America. But are there rules of etiquette when it comes to the aftermath of failed marriages? It is going to be difficult for everyone, especially the children, but there are ways to lessen the blow and let the healing process begin. We can moderate our behavior and words in ways that, at the very least, do not create more trouble.

The relationship we forge post-marriage with our ex, and how much integrity with which we conduct ourselves, will go a long way in determining how the family pulls through. There is hope in making it better by considering this code of honor for the divorced dad.

D – Devotion to family harmony first. By placing the emotional security of the family above our own feelings, we provide a greater sense of stability. That will benefit our children greatly as they continue to grow.

I – Integrity in behavior. A divorced man is starting a brand new life and that will bring new people and new life events. However, your children are still sponges and they are soaking up your every move.

V – Vigilant in protecting our children. Though we may be removed from them physically at times after the divorce, we must still anticipate trouble and stay fully involved in their daily lives.

O – Optimistic about the future. When parents divorce, oftentimes children feel like their world has collapsed. Be sure to instill hope in your children that better times are ahead and that you will always be part of their lives.

R – Reliability in honoring commitments. Whether court ordered, or mutual agreements upon splitting, it is essential that a father keep his word and provide for his family whatever he has promised them.

C – Consistency with time. As time moves forward, our lives will bring new challenges and commitments…and perhaps a new family. Be sure to remain consistent with your children and not allow them to feel like they are forgotten. [Tweet This]

E – Evaluate our parenting performance regularly. Self-reflection will be critical in moving our own lives forward. It is the same with our job as a parent. Make it routine to assess what we are doing well and areas where we can improve.

Sound Off

Which one of these principles do you think is the hardest to live by?

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Huddle up with your ex-wife and seek to declare a truce.


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